What I wish I’d known before adoption
Since Harriet Fancott adopted a baby last year, she’s had time to reflect on what, despite all her preparation, she wasn’t prepared for. Adoption is parenting I wish I’d known more about the realities of parenting a newborn baby before adopting. We were so focused on the details and issues surrounding adoption that the minutiae […]
Meet the Whitehead family
The Whiteheads adopted their son, Thomas, as a baby, and while he was born premature and with health complications, he has grown up into a healthy, sports-loving teen. The Whiteheads have an open relationship with the birth family, and that has helped them to keep their son close to his Indigenous roots. This is their adoption story. Can you […]
Adopted voice: Whose son, whose daughter
The question of a lifetime The complexity of my adoption story makes it a challenge to tell, but telling it is, I think, essential. It’s a way to preserve memories of the living and dead, to lend their lives some meaning, and to give thanks for the good fortune of having been raised by loving […]
Unexpected challenges
My desire to explore the unexpected led me to talk to two sets of parents about their journeys through adoption and into being a family. When adopting, these couples experience trials they had never have imagined. Some of the unique hurdles they faced were predictable, while others were completely unexpected. Frances, Gaynor, and Scott Frances […]
Meet the Hobbs-Perry family
Wow, we are the parents of two children that just celebrated birthdays. Our daughter just turned three and our son just had his first birthday. The journey to become parents began when I turned 40, and my parental clock went into overdrive. It became clear to me, if I was wanted to make my dreams of […]
Jared’s dads on the building blocks of parenthood
Jared is a happy, active toddler. As I visit with his parents, Jared amuses himself with various toys. When he tires of playing alone, he climbs onto a parental lap and plays “Got your nose” or tries to engage in a game of tickle or playful roughhousing. In between interacting with or checking on Jared, his parents lovingly […]
Adoption against all the odds
The following story is far from typical-most BC families that adopt from the US have a much easier experience. This story speaks to the immense strength of the desire to become parents. Despite the enormous difficulty of their journey, the couple we feature here persevered. That is a characteristic of many adoptive families-it is a […]
The complexity of adoption ethics
In this discussion paper, I hope to open a door for reflection and discussion within the adoption community, meaning adoption agencies, support services, and adoptive and prospective adoptive parents. It is time to examine our underlying values and biases in adoption, and address how the adoptive system advantages some, while disadvantaging others. When my husband and […]
Explaining the need to know my birth family
“If I were an adoptee, I think I’d want to search for my birth parents. I’d be curious, I think,” Cathy tells me. “Oh, no, I wouldn’t want to,” says Joanne. “I was raised by my biological parents and I may look like them, but I am nothing like them in personality. Who cares whose […]
