The path to parenthood through adoption, kinship, or another permanency arrangement is filled with dreams, hope, and a whole lot of heart. But waiting can be tough — it can stir up emotions, test your patience, and sometimes feel overwhelming.
While you get ready to welcome a child into your life, remember that caring for yourself is part of the process too. Gentle, consistent self-care helps you stay grounded, reduces stress, and prepares you for the joy and challenges of parenting ahead.
Why self-care matters
Self-care is more than a buzzword. It includes anything that intentionally supports or restores your mental, emotional, and physical health. Waiting can bring a mix of anticipation, anxiety, and even frustration. Without self-care, these feelings can pile up, making it harder to stay balanced and present.
Investing in your well-being now has long-term benefits:
- It can reduce stress and prevent burnout
- It strengthens your ability to parent with patience and presence
- It helps you build coping strategies for future challenges
Self-care strategies for waiting parents
Even small daily practices can make a big difference. Consider incorporating some of the following into your routine:
- Mindfulness and reflection: journaling your thoughts, hopes and frustrations, or practising short meditation sessions
- Movement: gentle stretches, walks or activities that get your body moving
- Social connection: reach out to supportive friends, family or other waiting parents
- Creative outlets: engage in hobbies, music or activities that bring you joy
- Intentional breaks: pause with purpose to rest or recharge
- Professional support: counselling, therapy or coaching can help you navigate emotional ups and downs
Planning self-care before your child arrives
The waiting period is a perfect time to build habits and routines that you can continue after your child arrives. Think of it as preparing a toolkit: the more you practise now, the easier it will be to rely on these strategies later, when parenting demands are higher. Here are some ideas:
- Set aside 5-10 minutes a day for reflection or mindfulness
- Create short morning or evening routines
- Plan regular movement breaks or exercise
- Schedule social connections or check-ins with your support network
- Explore hobbies or relaxation activities now, so they become sustainable habits
You might consider writing a pre-placement self-care plan with 3-5 actionable strategies you want to carry forward once your child is home.
Self-care for parents of children with support needs
If you are preparing to parent a child with support needs, whether due to trauma, developmental challenges, or behavioural concerns, self-care becomes even more crucial. Intentional routines support your energy, patience and emotional resilience. Try these self-care ideas:
- Schedule small breaks throughout the day
- Use calming routines such as mindfulness apps, music, or breathing exercises
- Accept help with meals, chores, or errands
- Journal thoughts and feelings to process emotions
- Prioritize sleep and gentle physical activity
- Connect with other adoptive parents for peer support
- Seek professional guidance when needed
Start small, start today
Self-care doesn’t need to be complicated or time-consuming. Even five minutes of mindful breathing, a short walk, or connecting with a supportive friend counts. The key is consistency and intentionality. By prioritizing your well-being now, you’ll be better equipped to parent with patience, presence, and love when the time comes.
Want to learn more? Join our monthly Waiting Parent Support online discussion group to explore practical strategies, share experiences, and hear from adoptive and permanency parents about how self-care has strengthened their parenting journey.
