The waiting season can be a powerful time to build knowledge, nurture relationships, and gently prepare your home and heart. Here’s a list of things to consider adding to your personal preparation plan.

Connection and community

Emotional and mental wellness

  • Find a trauma-informed, adoption-competent therapist or counsellor
  • Explore counselling as a couple or family to strengthen communication
  • Try mindfulness, grounding exercises, or journaling to manage uncertainty
  • Name and acknowledge feelings of grief, ambiguous loss, and hope
  • Ask yourself: What do I need to feel emotionally supported during this time?

Learning and self-education

Reading list suggestions:

  • The Connected Child – Karyn B. Purvis, David R. Cross, and Wendy Lyons Sunshine
  • What Happened to You?: Conversation on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing – Bruce D. Perry and Oprah Winfrey
  • Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew – Sherrie Eldridge
  • Honestly Adoption: Answers to 101 Questions About Adoption and Foster Care – Mike Berry and Kristin Berry
  • Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today’s Parents – Deborah D. Gray
  • It’s Not About You: Understanding Adoptee Search, Reunion, and Open Adoption – Brooke Randolph
  • The Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child – Nancy Verrier
  • Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers – Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté
  • Beyond Behaviors or Brain-Body Parenting – Mona Delahooke
  • Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work – Robyn Gobbel

Podcast suggestions:

  • Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption, Foster & Kinship Care – Creating a Family
  • The Baffling Behavior Show – Robyn Gobbel
  • Adoption Wise – Melissa Corkum and Lisa Qualls
  • Adoptees On – Haley Radke
  • The Honestly Adoption Podcast – Mike and Kristin Berry
  • Therapist Uncensored Podcast – Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley
  • Connected Families Podcast – Connected Families

Practical readiness

  • Curate a readiness checklist (e.g., safety planning, home setup, Life Book supplies)
  • Organize adoption-related paperwork, documents, and training records
  • Start or update your family’s Life Book or welcome book
  • Write a letter to your future child
  • Explore ways to represent your future child’s identity, culture, or story in your home

Understanding support systems

Respite, play, and self-care

  • Make a list of trusted friends or family for future babysitting or respite
  • Rest, travel, and enjoy solo or couple activities
  • Practice saying yes to joy and no to burnout
  • Keep a self-care list: hiking, movies, journaling, art, naps, etc.
  • Try a creative project (painting, crafting, gardening, etc.) as a grounding outlet

Identity and values

  • Reflect on your “why” for adopting—write it down or revisit it regularly
  • Define your hopes for your family’s values and culture
  • Learn about cultural humility and the importance of preserving a child’s story and heritage
  • Research openness, contact, and respectful relationships with birth family
  • Think about how you’ll talk about adoption openly and honestly in your home

Suggested journaling prompts

  • “Right now, I’m learning…”
  • “What I hope my future child feels in our home…”
  • “A parenting value I want to embody is…”
  • “One thing I want to let go of is…”
  • “One thing I’m grateful for in this season…”

Looking for more ways to slow down and reflect? Download our intentional waiting journal—a printable tool with simple prompts to help you reflect, connect, and prepare for the journey ahead.